d_d

Keep a record of things in life.
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Properly Alone

R: Why do you think it’s going to be so different in America?

G: Because it will be

R: Have you ever been properly alone ?

G: Of course I have

R: I mean properly alone. Sat in a hotel room in Portland, all by yourself, no friends, alone.

G: yes

R: I don’t believe you, I don’t believe you. In a week, you’re going to go completely mental. Of course you are. Because you have no friends, and you’re going to compromise because that is what people do, they comprise, because nobody, fucking, fucking nobody, nobody can deal with being by themselves.

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It doesn’t just go away

我被罩在透明的球形塑料中,思考着一切现象背后的本质,最后发现根本没有尽头。缸中之脑的信号又有什么意义呢,改造世界?发现真理?真理是永远不可能被发现的
那这一切与我有关的,无关的,悲喜的,又有什么意义呢
事隔四年,我没想到自己的大脑又进了沙箱里,就像没有洞台球桌一样,一个个想法蹦出来,弹来弹去,越弹越慢,弹出了很多,大脑也越来越沉,但是还在弹,一直弹。我想的都是没有意义的。
人类生存繁殖,就是在寻找生存繁殖的意义,如果找不到,就要继续这个过程,直到找到为止。我希望这个意义真的存在吧,但那时候也没有定义意义的主体了。

5627C1ED-C2CC-47EC-8972-00568EEEB396.jpeg

It doesn’t.

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deal

JZ, [01.11.18 00:27]
我觉得谈恋爱有的时候

Dee Dong, [01.11.18 00:27]
那你睡吧

JZ, [01.11.18 00:27]
就是这样吧…

Dee Dong, [01.11.18 00:27]
嗯怎么?

Dee Dong, [01.11.18 00:27]
啥意思?

JZ, [01.11.18 00:27]
思前想后

JZ, [01.11.18 00:27]
做了一件事

JZ, [01.11.18 00:28]
到底对不对

JZ, [01.11.18 00:28]
不知道

JZ, [01.11.18 00:28]
只有看到对方的反应后才知道

Dee Dong, [01.11.18 00:28]

JZ, [01.11.18 00:28]
我睡觉有个技巧

JZ, [01.11.18 00:28]
如果睡不着的话

JZ, [01.11.18 00:28]
我只要想一个特定的东西就能睡着

JZ, [01.11.18 00:29]
想听吗

Dee Dong, [01.11.18 00:29]

Dee Dong, [01.11.18 00:29]
我以为你已经说完那个技巧了

Dee Dong, [01.11.18 00:29]
原来是指一个特定的东西

JZ, [01.11.18 00:29]
那个特定的东西

Dee Dong, [01.11.18 00:29]
the

JZ, [01.11.18 00:30]
是我和你提过的那个极深的地牢

JZ, [01.11.18 00:30]
有螺旋的楼梯

Dee Dong, [01.11.18 00:30]
去去去

JZ, [01.11.18 00:30]
几百转的楼梯

Dee Dong, [01.11.18 00:30]
我tm才不会

JZ, [01.11.18 00:30]
一层一层向下走

Dee Dong, [01.11.18 00:30]
想那个睡着呢

JZ, [01.11.18 00:30]
这个和sex无关

JZ...

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raiders

  • “Don’t sell cotton candy again.”

“why not”

  • “Don’t sell cotton candy no more bro”

“why not”

  • “sell coke, water, don’t sell that cotton candy”

“bro I got four kids and they gotta eat”

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black cat

  • jazz club.
  • suit case. getaround complaints.
  • that BMW jacket, and a cap.
  • castro daiquiri. manhattan, triple.
  • steak, steak, steak, steak. asked for medium but partially over medium.
  • notifications.
  • “trout” but salmon.
  • leftover sweets.
  • the morning before LA.
  • “I don’t like taking pictures.”

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no_picture.png

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reduction

Leave it on.

Lowest brightness, moderate volume, sounds just distant enough.

Turn the hue to the night mode. Dark, slice of yellowish warmth.

Naked.

Turn to the other side, I’m never a side sleeper. But it helps, for the reduction.

Kindle’s lighted up, the page staring back. Eyes closed, with the smell, imaginations.

Wondering what A.M. would be a nightmare woke up. Or straight to the morning for the notifications.

Repeat. Memory’s flushing.

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direct

Me and read receipts have a love hate thing.

Today I want to turn them off. How can you expect somebody to constantly respond?

It’s probably designed to play games. Just imagine how many mind games you can pull by utilizing read receipt.

I’m not in the game for it.

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donut

“Btw I have an extra donut if you want I can give it to you”

  • “Why do I sound like I need a donut?”

Sorry.

  • He shouldn’t have phrased it that way.

You shouldn’t have read it that way.

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(WFH) Ideas Bounce

I started to understand why Drew watched every episode of She’s Gotta Have It twice, maybe not exactly clear about the reason that he thinks it’s a must watch for him but I see why it’s worth to watch twice. A fun fact, do you know that the show is actually first on film as a comedy-drama movie in 1986, a black-and-white TV era. It’s the same storyline with the 2017 Netflix version without cultural polish from 2017. Isn’t it interesting that millennials carried out the same spirit, problems, and fights while being distinguished as provocative and different?

It is a show that can free you of thinking or digging deep into the hidden message. The show itself is the thinking. It’s clear, obvious, and straightforward on what it’s trying to convey. It’s almost never happened to me, that I wasn’t too mentally exhausted after watching a show, or too dragged into it. Inspirational I would call...

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“Fragile As F**k”

  • How fragile is your masculinity?

What do you mean? I don’t even know how masculinity is defined by the society nowadays.

  • I think people who have internal homophobia or are sexist most probably have rather fragile masculinity. They would not allow any action, speech, any expression to hurt or even get in the way of them showing or maintaining their masculinity.

Hmm, interesting question. Then I don’t think I have fragile masculinity.

  • It could also be a situation like when a male lawyer feels jealous, insecure or even hurt when a female colleague posts an aggressive working style and tries to step up. Well, this is just an example.

Yeah, I could think and understand this case. But it could happen in both directions.

  • Yeah, absolutely right, masculinity doesn’t limit itself to just men. It seems more like being in control, a dominant position in which that masculine traits and...

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